Well, you certainly don’t have to be a super-human type being to get up on the ceiling. And you don’t have to be a rock climber hang upside down. And you really don’t need to work for the phone company, either. How do you do it? Let me explain to you how. Feast you eyes on some serious awesomeness. This amazing Aluminum Overhead Garage Rack and Hoist takes your bike, and HANGS IT!
Pretty neat, huh? The first time I installed one back in 2003, my kids and I stood and stared. My ex-wife said it looked like a scene out of her favorite film, “E.T. The Extra Terrestrial”. She was exactly right, and the Aluminum Overhead Garage Rack’s tough cam lock and frame is exactly right as well. You know what? It also holds ladders, if your bike is out in the shop. Or you’re out riding it. It’ll actually safely hoist up anything you want, up to 75 pounds! That was great for my cramped garage, when it existed. There just so much stuff around in there, the Aluminum Overhead Garage Rack really helps. It helps your bike “rise above”! (Ha-ha, sorry, bad pun.)
I’d nab one of these Aluminum Overhead Garage Racks quick, and hang your goods up, if I were you. You’ll be envied by your neighbors, and like I said, your kids will love watching things float up there. Mine used to. And my new fiance was so happy after I bought one, that she said that she could overlook all of my “wacky eccentricities” because I finally came though on something I said I could: I made a bike float in the air. Ha-ha! Peace!
Jeez, how about this guy? He’s headin’ for a brusin’ — or crusin’ for a hurtin’. If only we could save him from his fate, with like a really neat futuristic device that could change the way gravity works, like really just make sure he didn’t clobber his face and more importantly wreck that sweet bike, simply by using a device that could stop gravity in it’s tracks and by extension stop this guy and his bike in their tracks so he didn’t wreck that cool bike and break face, which he’s about to do. Man, too bad it’s only 2010 (almost 2011, ha-ha) and no one has invented that futuristic thing yet, and when they do, they should invent a futuristic time machine so they can go back in time and stop this guy from eating it. But hey, maybe he didn’t crash his bike into that rock, sending him over the edge of that cliff, maybe gravity DID stop, maybe gravity stopped, and everyone was so freaked out that some forward-thinking guy actually had time to go run and get his camera and take a photo of this biker floating in midair. Maybe. I doubt it. You don’t mess with gravity. But what I don’t doubt, is the coolness of this similarly titled bike-rack, the Gravity Bike Rack. Cool!! Right? It’s from Stacks.
A bicycle stand built for two! The space-saving Gravity Bike Rack holds 2 bicycles and helmets securely and needs no installation. Just choose a location and place the bike-rack against any wall. That’s all! No drilling into walls, and no mounting hardware. For added convenience, this unique bike storage stand has two hooks to hang riding helmets. Rubber pads on the back of the rack protect your wall. Perfect for apartments, condos, garages, homes and anywhere space is limited or permanent markings are prohibited. Arms can be partially rotated. Bike rack extends 12.5″ from the wall. Made of sturdy steel tubing. Weight limit is 100 pounds. Good luck!
AHHGH! BIGFOOT! Like there isn’t enough danger out there for the modern bike enthusiast, we’re faced with a pwefora of reports from the northwestern seaboard about Yeti Strikes on unsuspecting bicyclists. Horrible. The AP is filing story after story about lone bike riders, out on lonely forest paths, who unexpected run into this loner, this cryptozoological behemoth, and are scared senseless. While common sense thinking would have us bike-fans sticking to the tried-and-true streets and bike paths of our towns and cities, I refuse to accept that we can no longer journey into nature. I will not relinquish my right to load my car with 4 of my favorite bikes, using the aforementioned 4 Bike Car Bike Rack from Stacks and Stacks, and head into the great wilderness.
If you’re with me, and want to head out to the northwest territories and ride bikes, you’d better believe the 4 Bike Car Bike Rackis your best bet. This awesome car bike rack provides the ultimate in flexibility to accommodate today’s wide variety of bike frame designs while still maintaining all the advantages of having a hitch mounted bike rack. This rack holds four bikes and rotates to allow your bikes to be carried with the wheels level to the ground and provide greater clearance. Other features include a locking knob for added security and soft vinyl cushioning, which is grooved for cables and provides a secure, scratch free ride for your bike. Can accommodate up to a 2 inch frame tube. Assembly required. Good luck!
Jeez, how about this guy? He certainly thinks he’s cool. Kids seem to do that. They act smart, crack wise, and mouth off. And when you mix dangerous levels of self-confidence, a 4th grade intellect, and allow no filter, you get… this blog! Ha-ha. Just kidding. No, really, you get kids! And poor kids; those poor, poor kids. After they are done acting smarter than adults and sassing elders, they notice that their bike is stolen. But wait, son, I thought you were so smart! I thought I told you to chain and lock your bike to a rack when you got to the park, and you told me you didn’t need to! Stop crying, son! I thought you were so certain of your world, a world that no longer includes your bike. How did you think your bike was stolen? Can you think of anything, anything at all that could have prevented thieves from taking your bike, forever? Anything that I suggested to you before you went to the park? No? Really? Smart-ass kids. They often end up with no bikes. I doubt things will even change. But what I don’t doubt, is the coolness of this playfully titled bike-rack, the Indoor/Outdoor Poly Lumber Bike Rack. Cool!! Right? It’s from Stacks.
Tired of tripping over those kid-sized bikes in your garage? Sick of near-misses with bikes left laying in the driveway? Take a close look at the Indoor/Outdoor Poly Lumber Bike Rack. This bike rack can hold both child and adult sized bikes! That means this bike rack has a capacity of up to 8 bicycles. It is crafted out of Poly Lumber - which is lumber mixed with plastic. That means the bike rack won’t split, or rot away - plus the color will last for many years without fading. The black pipes are aluminum, and the hardware is stainless steel. Instructions and necessary hardware included, all you need is a 7/16″ wrench for assembly! And kids, remember: even if you ignore grown-up advice to lock and rack your bike, be sure to follow the advice of those big yellow signs. Good luck!
No, hanging bikes up on the walls isn’t a dream. The dream is real! Ha-ha. It’s no totally possible to hang a bike, and enjoy it later. How do you do it? Let me explain to you how. Feast you eyes on some serious awesomeness. This amazing Aluminum Overhead Garage Rack and Hoist takes your bike, and HANGS IT!
Pretty neat, huh? The first time I installed mine, I almost couldn’t believe I wasn’t dreaming. Like a criminal in a weird foreign country that doesn’t give criminals any human rights, your bike will hang, and the Aluminum Overhead Garage Rack’s tough cam lock and frame is just as tough as that weird foreign country’s laws. You know what? It also holds ladders, if your bike is out in the shop. Or you’re out riding it. It’ll actually safely hoist up anything you want, up to 75 pounds! That’s great for my cramped garage. There just so much stuff around in there, the Aluminum Overhead Garage Rack really helps. It helps your bike “rise above”! (Ha-ha, sorry, bad pun.)
I’d nab one of these Aluminum Overhead Garage Racks quick, and hang your goods up, if I were you. You’ll be envied by your neighbors, and like I said, your kids will love watching things float up there. Mine do. Sometimes I still think I’m dreaming when I look at it. But then I think about how much value it gives me for the price, well, I know I must be dreaming! I love it!!
Oh my GOD! The New World Order is trying to take away our bike racks AGAIN!! You should read THIS ARTICLE from The Denver Post as fast as possible!! Republican gubernatorial candidate Dan Maes is warning voters that Denver Mayor John Hickenlooper’s policies, particularly his efforts to boost bike riding, are “converting Denver into a United Nations community.” “This is all very well-disguised, but it will be exposed,” Maes told about 50 supporters who showed up at a campaign rally last week in Centennial. Maes said in a later interview that he once thought the mayor’s efforts to promote cycling and other environmental initiatives were harmless and well-meaning. Now he realizes “that’s exactly the attitude they want you to have.” “This is bigger than it looks like on the surface, and it could threaten our personal freedoms,” Maes said. He added: “These aren’t just warm, fuzzy ideas from the mayor. These are very specific strategies that are dictated to us by this United Nations program that mayors have signed on to.” My GOD — this isn’t a ha-ha moment, this is very real. The UN is going to quite possibly strip away all our human rights, and do it after tempting us bike enthusiasts with the promise of more bike racks and paths!! Anyway, until people figure out that we can have bike racks without UN control, and until people start to think for themselves and we fight the UN, we still have plenty of great racks right here and now!
In these troubling economic times, and even in Denver, you need value and dependability. If that’s what you’re after, then you’re after this awesome Aluminum Bike Rack that is Tension Mounted! There’s no minimum to the aluminum here, friends, it’s all aluminum. This rack is sleek and slender and it totally stores up to 2 bikes right out of the box, or you can add more with other attachments. If you look at the web page you’ll see how. It’s cool! It’s got a no-holes tension adjustment that secures the bike rack without wrecking your wall, and in these tough economic times, that’s cool. It adjusts to fit ceilings from 7′ to 11′ — like the convenience store. And that’s convenient. I would say this is a futuristic rack, maybe not crazy futuristic like the new space-age phones and all the internets, but it’s still pretty dang modern. You don’t really need anything more than a roof over your head, a nice family (just like my girlfriend and three daughters), a couple of bikes, and a good place to rack them. All this other crazy technology is just glitter. It’s cool, but you can always just stick to the essentials! Good luck!
Ouch, this bike rack is done. It’s all over for this rack. There will be no more bikes in this rack’s future. It’s broken. Afraid YOU are going to break your bike rack? Don’t worry. All my friends on the Bike Rack Forum have a whole lot to say on the subject, and you can check out here, at this link right here. It seems like these days, besides all the troubling economic news and stories about Tiger Woods, it seems like all the innovations are just getting cooler and cooler! How about a cool way to rack a bike inside your garage or home or apartment, quick and easy? I’m glad you asked, friends, because I have just the thing!
This is a 2 Bike Gravity Rack that is just the best for keeping 2 of your bikes safe and racked. There’s no need for complicated wires and pulleys and nails, as cool as those things are, because this bicycle rack simply leans against the wall! That’s called perfect if you live in an apartments and small storage sheds, it won’t even upset your walls! The 2 Bike Gravity Rack features independently adjustable arms, and it totally fits just about any style of bike. Well, not the bike picture up above (that crazy red bike of the future thing that might just be a car), but your bike, probably. It just goes to show you that sometimes, neat future things are zippy and fun to look at, but when it comes down to it, the best kind of bike racks and bike stands and 2 bike gravity racks and the kind that are simple and easy to use. Keep it simple, Simon! Good luck!
Hi friends. Still here. Yes, I got all of your e-mail. No, I still can’t talk about what happened to me. My lawyer says I have to wait. SORRY! Ha-ha. Don’t worry, though, it’s worth the wait! Ain’t that the way life always goes? You’re not kidding. And then you die! Ha-ha. But hopefully not before you learn about what happened to me. And speaking of hellish nightmares, is there anything worse than eating it? You know, really eating it, like bad, like wrecking your face? How about eating it and wrecking your face and having some dude standing there with a CAMERA?! Oh snap! Looks like this poor fella ordered a wrecked face for lunch. Instant delivery! Is he on Facebook? Because he just booked it into his face. And thanks to the internet, we get to re-live it forever:
Maybe he should have stayed indoors and used this instead:
There’s a lot to be said for floating. If the face-wreck gentleman had the ability to float, he wouldn’t have eaten it! Ha-ha, I know! Okay, but you’re saying, “how can I float a bike? I don’t have an alien in a basket attached to the front.” Guess what? Nobody does. But they do have access to the internet, and they can shop at Stacks and Stacks. And there they can find the “Bike Lift - Floating Bike Rack“. And with it, you can float your bike. You can lift your bike up, up and away using the Bike Lift. This system is light-weight and easy to use. Just use the adjustable gripping hooks to grab your bike and pull up to 50 lbs up and out of the way. The rope locking mechanism ensures that what goes up does not come down until you want it to. This system can be used on ceilings up to 14 feet. Take bike racks to the next level with the Bike Lift. Because eating it on the street is kind of a bummer. Okay!
Remember way back when, when you first learned to ride a bike? I know, it was totally a loooooong time ago. But think back to when you took your first bike ride. Scary, terrifying, heart-stopping. Blind fear. Horror. The horror. Gravity. Pavement. Pain. Busted bike, terrifying memories, awful nightmares. Thanks to my militant father who laughed at my tears and fed me shame, I got right back up on that bike and rode it. Right down the street, right over the curb, right down the hill, right into the parking lot, right into the moving station wagon. Right into the darkness of concussion. Right into the hospital. But it was all okay, because I gained a lifetime of respect for bikes and bike riding and bikes and bike racks. So thanks, dad. But you know what would have helped waaaaaaaay back when, helped me to avoid the cruel, excruciating agony of that first day riding a bike? This Skuut Wooden Balance Bike from the gang over at Stacks and Stacks.
Cool! Supercool! Your kids can take the fear out of riding a bike with the Skuut! The Skuut is a wooden bike meant for kids ages two to five. It has no pedals, no at all, and no training wheels. None! The Skuut teaches children the principles of balance, steering, coordination and - most importantly - confidence with a bike. Confidence! Now check out this coolness! Kids sit on the Skuut, and kick off the ground, as if running, thus pushing or ’skuut-ing’ themselves and the bike forward. Scooooot! Skuut! After some time mastering balance on the Skuut, the transition to a traditional two-wheel bike is a snap! Boy, I wish my old man knew that! Oh well. Ha-ha! Choose from just the Skuut, or the Skuut with a matching bike rack! Because this blog isn’t just supposed to be all about my hellish childhood, but about bike racks. Bike Racks Blog!! Remember, your kids will think it’s a hoot to Skuut! Good luck!
Sometimes when I’m searching for great new Bike Racks to share, I’ll come across an item that will totally surprise me. Completely surprise! I have been well schooled in the ways of “normal” Bike Racks, or “standard” Bike Racks, if you will. In fact, I could probably teach a master class in the subject, ha-ha! But after looking at, buying, using, and reviewing only the best in Bike Racks for years, I was totally knocked over when I saw this:
Do you know what that is? Can you tell? Your eyes are probably playing tricks on you, but don’t be fooled, that’s a BIKE RACK! And even better, it’s a FOLDING BIKE RACK! I found it over at StacksandStacks.com, and man, it’s stunning! And innovative! It stores two bikes flat against the wall, and when this rack isn’t being used, it totally folds down! It folds flat! So it’s not hard to move around like most big racks, and because it’s small, when you fold it down, it takes up NO ROOM except a small amount of space on your wall! It also has a neat shelf to store shoes or helmets. The Folding Bike Rack is made from tough epoxy coated solid steel, and it has PVC cushioned sleeves to protect the bike’s finish AND comes with a lifetime warranty. Amazing! You should check it out. I’ve ordered 3, and I’m going to surprise my family. I’m sure my wife will figure out what it is quickly, but my two daughters, not so fast! It folds!
